THANKS FOR HELPING ME GAIN SOME EXTRA MOOLAH!
Friday, May 16, 2008, 9:36:00 PM
of the unknown
i was sitting on my bathtub contemplating how i should put this correctly. it just suddenly occured to me.
it has been 8 years already.
it was an emotional roller coaster ride for me just now.
school today was relatively better compared to yesterday. econs was rather easy to handle.
after art, 6 of the PJ art students visited SAM. (if u dont know what this acronym stands for, too bad) im not gonna bother explaining. i tot the artist part was rather mundane, i couldnt appreciate his art. most sickening was the video part, i was hyper glad that i made it through the 20 minutes without dozing off.
anyways, after which was the rollercoaster ride part. i was overwhelmed with a wave of emotions both "elated-ness" and disappointment. i had to walk 300m back and forth because someone couldnt decide which way to go. we were running late already. As if the decision to walk to the nearest bus stop wasnt good enough, the journey to PS was even worst. maybe because he was insensitive, but do i look really chirpy as to interact with him at that moment? i was sure i made a wrong choice. it all started with this wrong choice i made. to have dinner at PS.
school today was relatively better compared to yesterday. econs was rather easy to handle.
after art, 6 of the PJ art students visited SAM. (if u dont know what this acronym stands for, too bad) im not gonna bother explaining. i tot the artist part was rather mundane, i couldnt appreciate his art. most sickening was the video part, i was hyper glad that i made it through the 20 minutes without dozing off.
anyways, after which was the rollercoaster ride part. i was overwhelmed with a wave of emotions both "elated-ness" and disappointment. i had to walk 300m back and forth because someone couldnt decide which way to go. we were running late already. As if the decision to walk to the nearest bus stop wasnt good enough, the journey to PS was even worst. maybe because he was insensitive, but do i look really chirpy as to interact with him at that moment? i was sure i made a wrong choice. it all started with this wrong choice i made. to have dinner at PS.
firstly, i was pissed off by the fact that is was already 740pm and i still couldnt have my dinner although i had already walked pass gazillion shops selling food. secondly, it was irritating that i coulnt click with the polymates. i know im steteotyping and this is bad. but i couldnt help judging. perhaps this is the way i am. part of the reason why i decided to agree to JR's request to eat with them was because i knew i missed those memorable secondary schooldays. the memories we had. but then i realized at the point i saw them, i felt felt.. empty?
the conversations that they found entertaining didnt seem to amuse me a single bit, their chinese seems so foreign to me now. i couldnt help but cast a superficial smile when someone would crack a joke that would make the whole group laugh. i had to follow suit. this was uncomfortable. dinner was awful. i had this fried scramble egg and chicken Jap rice which added on to my unhappiness. i couldn't help feeling everything around me was coming to an end.
however, i must say im very glad to have found a friend who always, A-L-W-A-Y-S backup last minute due to her selfish commitments and so called responsibilities.
its sad that this friendship might just die down like that. its sadder when sadness always lingers around always often more then that of happiness.
im disappointed. dont say anything cos i wanna hear nothing.
the ongoings
freedom of speech.